Journal December 2025 Release - Flipbook - Page 15
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Curriculum vitae of Mental Illness
Joanna tried many times to take her own life. She used her prescription
medication to overdose and combined it with acts of self-harm, cutting her wrists
and other parts of her body. In narrative language, we might re-phrase this as her
acts of resistance to the societal oppressions and expectations she could not
change. One day, she explained to me how hard she fought to remain in the real
world, to get up, dress up, and show up. But when the stress and anxiety
overwhelmed her, psychosis extended a warm invitation to just fall into its
waiting arms, where she would be confined to a psychiatric hospital, with no
responsibility, and where she could be taken care of.
Over the years, the problems in her life had, in a manner of speaking, trained her
how to let go when the going became too tough. At this point, she also believed
fate had handed her a tragic life script where she, like her late uncle, who had
committed suicide at a young age, would not survive beyond the age of forty.
Where do I begin?
Joanna enjoyed the sessions as much as I did, even though she regarded
depression and anxiety as the major issues for the time. In line with seeking
unique outcomes as we do in narrative therapy, I wondered whether she might
be able to recall times when anxiety and depression were less present. Joanna
had remarkable stories to tell about those times of freedom without anxiety and
depression. For example, shortly after the birth of their daughter, Joanna said she
observed how the other new mommies and housewives were managing and
copied them. Consequently, she spent seven years free from anxiety and
depression. She exclaimed, “I even baked my own bread!”
Even during those years without apparent depression and anxiety, Joanna
experienced challenges related to performance anxiety and perfectionism.
Although an eating disorder was part of her childhood history, she refused to
accept that it had any effect on her now. True to the values of narrative therapy,
where the client is the expert, I assumed the position of a de-centred but
influential listener who worked from a not-knowing position, privileging Joanna’s
stories. As our relationship developed, there were times when I voiced concern
about changes in Joanna’s eating patterns and drastic fluctuations in her weight.
An Apprenticeship in Extremis
Journal of Contemporary Narrative Therapy, December 2025 Release, p. 5-44.
www.journalnft.com
